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Gambling addiction hotline

How do I tell my partner about what I've done!

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Gambling addiction hotline embed lyrics

Postby Meran В» 15.08.2019

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Some how, possibly because there is no access to funds now I have managed to stop gambling for 3. Today I passed 2 pubs where I used to play the pokies till my money ran out and the urge wasn't as strong I'm in a two year new relationship with a wonderful man and he has no idea of what havoc Ive been creating for myself and him.

Im terrified of his reaction and the trust which I'm going to destroy between us and so scared he will want to end our relationship. Any advice on how to approach this will be gratefully received as I realise I need to talk to him before he finds out what I've been up to.

Barely managing the payments now and time is running out Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works! Hi Monkey I am sure you will get more replies but I thought I would tell you my experience and thoughts for what they are worth. Then allow the man in your life a few moments to think of what you have said and hopefully ask his questions. I think it is important not to make it look as though you blame him in any way and I think it is very important that you let him know you are seeking help.

It took me 2 more years to begin to accept any such addiction existed but in that time my CG did not talk about recovery. When he showed me that he really wanted to live gamble-free by, in his case, going into rehab I was able to gain the knowledge I needed to cope, to understand as best I could but most importantly to support him and me in the right way.

Trust will be dented but in many, many cases that I know of, a problem had already been suspected. Trust can be rebuilt and fantastic relationships worked out as a result. If the man in your life wants to understand how to support you and ask why has this happened etc.

I hope you will post again soon and tell us more about yourself I wish you well Velvet. Thank you Velvet for your kind words. I've been trying to tell my partner for weeks but I'm always finding excuses not to. Like, after this weekend or after our friends have left or after this or that event. Excuses, excuses excuses! Both our lives are going to change and its eating me up. He has made negative comments about gamblers before when he suspected one of his step daughters had a problem I'm feeling so guilty about it all and the debt hangs round my neck like a noose getting tighter by the day.

I've woken up feeling okay and know this is another day without gambling and that I know I can be proud of. This journal will help me stay focussed. It's not his fault but I think I know what triggered in back in March again.

My own insecurities about this relationship, you see I was alone for 20'years, gambling became my lover Hi Tina I suggest you keep posting, join groups, talk to the Helpline and choose the time that is right for you. Do you have any plan in place for clearing this debt because gambling will never be the answer?

Can you speak to your creditors and ask for time to pay? Do you have family or friends that you can talk to? Stay focussed on your recovery because you deserve it and hopefully when the time comes you will be able to cope with whatever happens. Thinking about you Velvet. As yet no plan about making back the payments, barely keeping my head above water I know if my partner stands by me that he will help me with a plan of payment as he is really good with sorting out money..

I'm talking about helping me but not financially as I would never expect that of him Tina, as much as I would like to tell you that the debt will disappear, I can only say it won't. Further gambling will add to it. Secrecy enables up to keep borrowing. Denial and fear will only serve to postpone the dreaded confession. The truth is only way to deal with your relationship and your gambling.

One word of advice. If you plan on telling him anything, tell him everything. Drip feeding information about gambling and debt has a more detrimental effect on relationships than spitting out the full truth. Pick the right moment. C ount to three. Say a prayer. And let it all out! Good luck! Thanks for your words Vera. There is a chicken in me that keeps preventing me to tell him.

I'm telling myself "okay, I need to do this now". Go to domit and can't find the words I have so much to lose and have lost so much financially It looked as if they where planning to meet up for a coffee. I snooped on his ph and perhaps got what I deserved because of this. I confronted him about it and we sorted it but this I think was my trigger through my own insecurities that started me back on this horrific addiction.

Could I ask how long it was since you last gambled? Prior to starting again? Were you attending GA or going to counseling?

I too had to fess up to my partner. I took care of OUR money and had left us an inch away from bankruptcy. I kept looking for any solution to deal with my debt that wouldn't involve coming clean! Finally my gambling drove me to a place where I knew I had to stop!

Whether in my relationship or out of it. If he chose to leave me because I had an addiction, then that would be on him. In the end I had to do exactly what Vera is saying. I told him I needed to talk to him about something important. And then I told him I have a really bad gambling problem. And that we owed a lot of money as a result. Your partner will respond how he will. And he will have many emotions of his own to process. In a way its as bad as cheating on them really.

It is scary as hell to deal with this but it is really your own sanity that is at stake. Maybe start taking measures. Go to a GA meeting if any available or addictions counselling. Show him that you are taking action! All the best! I never really stopped but seemed more controlled, if that is even possible. WhT also changed in march is that I went back to online gambling after a tempting financial invite from casino action.

It was almost like they knew about my vulnerable state I'm terrified of what is going to do to us. On a brighter note I'm going to seek out a gambling addiction counsellor which is ironic when I am also a counsellor but don't work with people with addictions. I ask for strength to do what I must. Hey Tina, you will do it when you are ready. Well done on four weeks! I think addictions counseling is a very bright note. Even counselors are allowed to have problems. We are all a little blind when it comes to our own lives.

Emotions tend to do that to us i think. I'm glad we can help each other in our recovery journeys! Take care, Laura. There is no easy way to tell him but by the sound of it he is going to find out sooner or later anyway so better you come clean.

What does make it a little easier is not to just present the problem to him, show him what you are going to DO about it at the same time. It is an old saying here in UK - actions speak louder than words. It is the actions that you take to help you stop gambling that are the same actions that might help rebuild the trust etc.

Actions like getting excluded frim where ever it is that you usually gamble, actions like being accountable for money and time, actions like getting to Gamblers Anonymous meetings, posting here, finding more positive ways to fill time etc. As Vera said it is also important to come completely clean.

Kenny Rogers - The Gambler, time: 3:33
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Re: gambling addiction hotline embed lyrics

Postby Kazizshura В» 15.08.2019

It will also deflect your thinking from when to tell him. Your distorted htoline might just be saying that to do that would be easier than having to tell him. Denial and fear will only serve to postpone the dreaded confession.

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Re: gambling addiction hotline embed lyrics

Postby Moogujinn В» 15.08.2019

Recovery is not easy at all. The counsellor, relooking at the her email said she would get back to me this week so I'll give her a few more days. Always addicion great excuse to gamble. For meI think my husband wouldn't leave and even if he did I would survive - more than survive - on my own. My suggestion.

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